Maybe you’d all notice that people always, most of them, are talking about waiting. You know what, it does not matter. I’ve been observing my own life to make it more interesting and to evaluate the encounters that I’ve had. Months have passed since the last blog I’ve wrote and I come to realize that there are things that you shouldn’t have waited, in other words, you just do it. You just make it happen. Maybe, in your years living, you’ve noticed that the only person who always makes you is you. The only person that breaks you is you.
What I’m trying to say is, most of us think about what awaits us. A lot of times, we waste our time thinking instead of doing it. Which is why, we never get the dream we want. Who to blame? Well, this blog isn’t about scolding you or giving you some sermon. Why do we fear the future? What will happen to life after 10 years from now? What do I want for this life? Should I wait for the answer? That could a yes or a no. Of course, you wait but you’re moving. The meaning of “wait” does not mean you stop from doing something. So, you just keep going.
I want to tell people that they always have a dream and what awaits them does not matter. Know the things you should not wait. Then do it!
January 22, 2017
This is something we always encounter on our daily lives. Who does love conflict? No one. But conflicts can’t be avoided. It can’t be ignored. But it is meant to be fixed. It is meant to be addressed. Thus, why people are always avoiding it? What people will get when they have conflicts? Why the leaders of the company would never attempt to fix internal problems. In this article we will discuss the keys of dealing with conflicts in work environment. What are the causes of conflicts inside the work place? What makes them a problem? What should be done on the problem?
In conflicts, what are the possible results could happen to a company?
- Conflicts often result in loss of productivity
- It may eventually make a good talent walk out the door and search for a healthier and safer work environment
- It might get ruined a good company
- It will affect the quality of service they provide
- It affects relationship of the employee
We will able to see what areas should be improved and there are so many areas to be discussed. However, we will focus on the most important things. Here’s the list of keys dealing with conflicts.
- Communication– One of the main reason why we have conflicts is this. Most people are bad at communicating. As much as possible we do not try get attached verbally with the person. Or we communicate them virtually. There are advantages of virtual communication but it has also disadvantages. There people who are not phone person (including me). There are people who are good at this. But the thing is, we are too afraid of trying to communicate personally. For example, we want to address the error of an employee; we tend to tell them through our phones but can’t tell personally because we are afraid to offend the person. Or we are not good at how saying such correction. If you find yourself like this; this is some examples that you may say when you are correcting someone.
Instead of saying:
- I don’t like your work
- Your work assignment is so late! I can’t do this on time!
Say this rather:
- Good job! I can see that you have something to improve next time.
- I’d like to follow up the work assignment, is there anything I can do to help?
You can always ask what is going on rather than being rude to the person. Always ask questions in a gentle way as possible. Patience is the key. It is not easy, though. But you have to try.
- Understanding- We all have ego. As human being we fall at understanding things. When something goes wrong, chances are; we complain and get angry. But that’s not how fix conflicts. In order to understand the situation you are having, you need to take a deep breath and pause for a moment. There is a difference between reactive answer and responsive answer. When someone tells you something that might provoke to anger/sadness your reactive answer is your first initial emotion or your natural reaction (this natural reaction are mostly not good ones). A responsive answer is when you hear the same problem as mentioned above, you tend to pause for a moment and think what the right/appropriate reaction you should take is. This way you will get conflict away because you made the right reaction. You’d also save a friendship because you understand first before your ego triumph over you. Always understand where all feelings are coming from. I can give you some situation that might help how to take things lighter.
A friend from work says something about how you do your job. The intention was to correct the wrong.
Reactive answer: “No! You can’t say this now because I do what I have got to do and I know, what I’m doing is just fine!”
Responsive answer: “Thank you for correcting me, I’ll get this in mind”
You see the difference. You can always take a pause before answering such thing. Always be careful with your thought because your mind can be deceitful. A responsive answer can always save the day. Keep this in mind. If you find this difficult. The next key is important as you handle conflict.
This is unusual experience that I have ever had. I couldn’t help but remember the time I was with her. It was a business set up. I had to meet this woman who’s one of my prospective in doing business with. I got in the meeting place early because I don’t like being late.
So, I met her and we shook hands. I noticed that she smiles a lot whenever she’s talking to somebody. I noticed it because I got early in the meeting place and saw her meeting with somebody else before my meeting. She seems welcoming but peevish (masungit o mataray) not quiet sure if that’s the right term. But anyways, as we met, we sat down somewhere in cafe where no one was around but us. The cafe looks like a rusty type of cafe with musical instruments in a certain spot. I asked “This place is interesting, can a non-member eat here?”, she replied right away “No, you can’t. If you’re not a member you cannot eat or drink here”. The way she said it, it was cold and no patience as if I asked so many questions. So we proceeded to the business.
Whenever I present my business, people always get amazed by what they have seen. But this woman seemed to be bored and impatient in a very different way (which makes me attracted her instantly) As I presented, she cuts me off and say “Okay, I get it. Now, can we skip ahead?” In my mind, I say “what am I doing? Am I boring?”. Whenever she cuts in my presentation she smiles at me while finding it so ironical. She seems bored by me and it challenges me. I find her attractive not because she’s beautiful but because I find her unique in her own way. She challenges me because I did not get her by my charm as I present. She does not give a crap about it by the way. So, yeah. I’m instantly attracted to this woman. It was my first time to meet someone who caught my attention that fast!
After the meeting, I texted her and addressed my gratitude of meeting her. She replied “Likewise”. I profiled her after some certain time and found that she has a boyfriend and older than me. It saddened me somehow but that’s okay. hahaha! She was so interesting.”I could have asked her out” that was in my mind while on my way back to the city. I mean, I want to ask her out if she was single. Too bad, she is not. Hay buhay….. She’s interesting woman. Sayang…..
I hope I could meet someone like her, again. I hope the next one would be single. 🙂 Soon!
October 14, 2016
Hello, it is been months since I wrote to you. But it seems like forever of waiting for you. I’m lonely yet hopeful for the day I’d meet you my beautiful wife. Right now, a lot of things going on with my life. I’m busy making this life more interesting. But this is not the reason why I’m writing this letter. I’m writing because I miss you.
Sadness for no reason. Thoughts are coming in my head. Trying to understand myself. Trying to know where I am coming from. One thing I am sure. I am not yet ready to meet you. There is no easy way to explain but I’d like to prioritize myself first before facing the day I’d meet you. I know that God is all in control. I am trusting his moves. But this is not the reason why I am writing this letter.
I’m writing this because I want you to know that I am thinking about you even though I have no idea who you are, yet. It always leads my imagination of you to dreaming. Which leads me to frustrations in some ways. But I understand the feeling. It is not yet time. I have no clue when. I have no clue where. One thing that is certain, it will be the right place. I always wonder how you feel today, how are you doing at the moment I’m writing this letter. I wish I could give you a hug if you’re lonely and do the same thing for me.
I’m 23 turning 24. This is my second letter to you. I don’t remember but I suppose I wrote bunch of poems about you. No one.
Muntinlupa City, Philippines
Sept. 18, 2016
There are days that are so ordinary like you always go to routine. Some days are just like what you always expect when you wake, get up on bed, do your morning stuff and breakfast then go on your way to work. But some days are exciting just like what I am about to write down. There are so many reasons to make your day good even when you feel don’t like it, or when you’re getting something through. Well, it is on.
So, I went out to meet a prospective client to present my service as one of my usual work. As pretty usual, we always get compliments from clients because of what we offer from my company. It is architectural perspective and animation that we offer. (I’m getting off the track), anyways. So, after I had the meeting, I went to a coffee shop and ordered my favorite coffee. This barista girl asked for my name to put in my cup. (In every coffee shop, baristas are always asking for your name to place your order correctly) So, I said my name, however, I would have said “a man has no name”. If you’re watching “Game of Thrones” you’d get my point. In my mind, I’m laughing. Well, that’s how amuse myself. I know, I’m not the only one!! haha. So, there it goes, as I get my coffee, I turned to my table and relax and took a sip on my coffee. Then, I thought, life is beautiful. It is. I always think that God has a great sense of humor because I think most of this life is crap yet I still manage to smile and hope for little things. I’m hopeful person, although it makes me cry every single time. I always expect for something that I cannot see! I think that’s how faith works. God, I always believe.
I was still in the coffee shop, checking my e-mails with my laptop and work all at the same time. My work has been so stressing the previous weeks because I have this project that requires an IT to model a certain 3D for android and IOS. While sitting around my table, I noticed this woman’s table next to me. I saw her doing some stuff like what an IT does. I thought to talk to her but I was trying to make a perfect time. So, as my laptop gets drained, I took my charger to plug it in and so does she.
I took my chance to talk to her. Anyway. All this crap I just wrote was a practice. Practice of writing. lol.
This is a disclosed letter to a 27 year old version of myself.
I know you’re 27 years old the moment you read this and you have forgotten how the other stuff went through. You might not believe what you’ve gone through in this life, you might not believe what kind of pain you’ve been through and now you’ve endured because I’m confident that as of your time, you’ve already forgotten it, you’ve forgotten the feelings and how it was. And I know it, because you’re good at forgetting and because you is me.
I’m turning 24 soon this year (2016) and you’re 27 at your moment. Vicson. I want you to remember all the lessons you have learned. I want you to remember all the pain you had but I doubt you would recall them because I know you’d find it difficult to remember. I know you :). I want you to remember all the people who have hurt you. I want you to remember all your failures and rejections. I want you to remember your good times with your old friends. I want you to remember the people who have taken you for granted and who have betrayed you. I want you to remember the people who were the reason of your brokenness. I want you to remember the people who never called you because you weren’t needed. I want you to remember the times you’ve felt so alone.
All of these I just asked you to remember is not to take back the pain again. But I want you to cherish the times you have been there but still you are here. Without these things, where would you go? what kind of person you would become? what values would you learn? Maybe now, you have the idea how things went through. You might remember a little but that is okay. You won’t look back again because you have learned. You are wiser and more gentle.
I do not know what kind person you are right now, but i know you’re good at heart. You are so much stronger now. I am so thankful, yes i am.This is me your 24 year old version of yourself.
I miss writing. It is been my passion to express how i feel. I always imagine myself how perfect my life would be if I write and tell my love poems to my ezer kenegdo. Well, I believe one day I would recite all my poems to my ezer. I call this poem “Your eyes are so bright”
Let me kiss your tears and let it dry
You are perfect even when you cry
I so remember your eyes were so bright
Your smiling lips it is my delight
I count the times I made you smile
I count the times I made you laugh
All of you makes delight in me
Like a love that will never flee
April 27, 2016
Muntinlupa City, Philippines 1776
Hey guys. It’s Vic here.
It’s the month of April. I almost spent the half of the year doing some great stuff. My mom came home on March, so that month I spent my time with her. She has been gone like 11 years working abroad. And she spent here in the Philippines like 27 days only! So that’s about it. I started my year doing some study. I worked on economics and taxation. I also had the time to learn vlogging. It is now the trend nowadays. Well, to tell you the truth, I’m not very use to that kind of stuff but I’m learning.
Months have past and I’m still doing things that I reckon would help my development as an individual. It’s been a year. I remember the last year of April. I was so yearning for growth. And now I am here growing and growing. I got rid of Facebook in my daily routine. Well, it helped me, really. I’m not really on Facebook but sometimes I had to check on it to see people who were messaging me. Things changed about me. I’m maturing, I think.
Even though things changed about me, my feelings for bear does not change at all. I’m working so hard right now to get bear someday. I’m praying and hoping that all my faith and hope let be true. I miss you so much bear!
The other day I made a poem about her.
Let me kiss your tears and let it dry
You are so perfect when you cry
I so remember your eyes were so bright
Your smiling lips it’s my delight
I count the time I made you smile
I count the time I made you laugh
Hey, I haven’t been writing for a while but I’m here.
Lately, there’s something in my mind that’s been keeping me up at night. The thought is, I’m still searching where my life is going and at the same time I want to settle down. What do I mean by that? I want to settle down but I’m still not satisfied of what I’m doing with my life. It’s not that I’m wanting for more but I feel like there’s a missing piece that I have to find it first in order to settle down. Yeah, I wanna get married but not today. Lots of questions asked every night. Talking to God. What’s going on, God? Tell me what to do? I always ask this question and I think it’s quiet normal for people asking question like this.
Sometimes, I’m dreadful, doubtful, and etc. My story, I know, it’s gonna be amazing one. I put all my hope in my prayers, to God. This place is still unsettled. I’ve got to find out your answer.
Thanks for reading….
March 21, 2016
Muntinlupa City, Philippines 1776
It’s 1:08 AM (March 12, 2016). We are taking the road of somewhere road of Bulacan heading to Baler. Meanwhile, I’m having of this thought to write something about the meaning of smile. I’m full of energy to write right now. I barely sleep so I write. Here it goes. It’s called “My smile means everything”
My smile means everything
I smile through my laughter
Smile through all my pain
People don’t see it they don’t notice
My smile shows my courage to all
As anguish and joy set to grow
Like other people have the same
My smile shows no shame
I smile even in sadness and loneliness
Great is the art of happiness and brokenness
It’s ironic when we find life in such ways
And we learn what we want in hard ways
We must have called life an ironic thing when we find lessons through our own hardship.